The Peter Pan Syndrome
by Gaby Black
Summary: Oneshot. Written for the Reviews Lounge Fanon Challenge. If you thought Sirius Black was hilarious when drunk, then you might want to reconsider. On the last night of their seventh year Lily tries to rid Sirius of his Peter Pan syndrome.


**Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

**Pairing:** James/Lily, but story is mainly Sirius-centric.

**This was written for the Reviews Lounge's Fanon challenge. The 'fact' that often reoccur in fanfiction but is _not_ canon that I chose to turn upside down is: _Sirius Black is hilarious when drunk._**

**Which he is not (except a bit funny at the end, but at his expense!). **

* * *

**_The Peter Pan Syndrome_**

Sirius is leaning lazily against the wall, his long dark hair almost covering his face from his friends' eyes. He is looking out the window of the dormitory in silence, occasionally sipping his Firewhiskey. Remus is staring at him, wondering if Sirius is feeling half as fine as he pretends he is. It _is_, after all, their last night in Hogwarts, and Remus himself has not felt so down for a long time.

"Have one, Evans?" Sirius drawls, holding out the bottle of Firewhiskey, eyes slightly unfocused.

Soon he will be drunk, Remus thinks. Unfortunately, Remus knows only too well about the different stages of Sirius Black's drunkenness. Lily stops talking with Peter and James and purses her lips.

"I reckon you can call me Lily now, don't you think?"

There is an unmistakable note of fondness in her exasperated voice, but Sirius, James and Peter are probably too tipsy to pick it on**.**

"Have one, _Lily_?" Sirius forces himself to ask.

Lily smiles and nods. Sirius, wearing a somewhat pained expression, fills a glass and, instead of taking a few steps towards where Lily is sitting (on James's bed, next to James), magically lifts the glass so that it lands into her hands.

"Show-off," Lily mutters, but there's still this little smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

"Merlin, I feel like – I feel like I'm your _friend_," Sirius sighs. "This is not right."

There is a short, tense silence. Peter suddenly finds the carpet fascinating. Remus keeps his eyes on Sirius, still trying to read his mind. James is the first to react. Probably feeling he is going to need it, James stares longingly at the Firewhiskey.

"_Accio_ bottle. What do you mean by that?"

James's arm is on Lily's shoulder now. Sirius looks from Lily to James and winces.

"I didn't mean… didn't mean to be rude," Sirius says quickly. "It's just… it's _Evans_, right! Potter-I-hate-your-guts Evans! I don't know how you two can forget the things she used to tell you, or should I say the names she used to call you, right, and damn it, I just can't get used to this! I'm sorry."

Remus thinks that Sirius is not looking too sorry. Sirius hardly ever looks sorry.

"It's nothing against you, though, Evans," Sirius adds as an afterthought.

"Oh, no?" Lily says, her eyebrows raised above her unreadable eyes.

This time even Remus is unable to decipher her tone. But he knows one thing (and, judging by the frightened faces of his friends, they know it, too): these soft-spoken words are nothing good. James drinks; Lily pretends she doesn't see him.

"Explain," Lily just says.

Obviously, Sirius expected everything but this. His grey eyes widen and go from James to Remus as though seeking help. Remus must admit to himself that he is quite enjoying this: it is time someone showed Sirius that he is being ridiculously afraid of growing up, and he is glad this someone is not him.

"What?" Sirius asks hoarsely.

"Explain," Lily repeats. "Why is it it's so difficult for you to accept me when Remus and Peter are fine with it. Take your time, we've got all night."

"But _why now_?" Sirius whines, looking positively like a five-year-old.

Lily shrugs. "Because I want to know why you're acting this way. Why you keep looking at me as though I just stole your favourite toy and you're going to hit me hard in the face."

Sirius scowls at her.

"See, it's _that_ look I'm talking about."

Sirius rolls his eyes, muttering something under his breath.

"Well it _is_ scary," Peter says, and plunges his nose in his glass of Firewhiskey when Sirius turns his deathly glare to him.

James nods gravely. "I certainly wouldn't like to be looked at like that."

Remus says nothing. Sirius looks at him, and Remus can almost hear him think _help me, help me, help me_. Remus shrugs mercilessly. Sirius gives a great, dramatic sigh and steps towards James and Lily.

"I'm gonna need some more alcohol then," Sirius growls.

Sirius takes the bottle from James's hands and starts pacing. Lily seems to be wondering if it's some kind of Marauder rule that only James and Sirius have the right to drink directly from the bottle. It is. Remus thinks it's best she doesn't know everything.

"Well, er, where to start?" Sirius says pathetically.

"From the beginning, why not?" Lily replies dryly.

"You look like McGonagall when you do that," Sirius blurts out.

Lily seems to consider whether it is an insult or not, looking lovely as she tilts her head to the side.

"What's wrong with that?" Lily finally asks.

"She's a _teacher_! I don't want to hang around with a teacher!"

"Lily is not a teacher," James points out reasonably.

Remus nods, wondering when James began pointing out things reasonably.

"You know what I mean!" Sirius says, moving his arms wildly.

Sirius meets four blank stares and shakes his head miserably. It rather pains Remus to see his friend like this because he knows it's not easy for Sirius to express his feelings, and yet he thinks it is necessary. He knows Sirius likes Lily; he just finds it hard to let James go. It would be much easier if Lily knew this too.

"Where have you lot gone?" Sirius mutters. "Where's the… the Marauder spirit?"

Remus clears his throat; he is going to speak for the first time in several minutes. They all turn to look at him as though he must know The Answer.

"We're growing up, Padfoot," Remus says quietly.

"Oh the words of doom…" Peter whispers.

It sounded strong and definite in Remus's head but came out much weaker when he had met Sirius's eye. Sirius says nothing but gulps down Firewhiskey, which is a worrying sign. Even when he (finally) puts the bottle down, he says nothing, which results in the longest and darkest silence Remus has ever experienced. Everybody avoids looking at each other in the eye, except Lily, whose emerald eyes are still fixed on Sirius.

"So this is your problem," Lily says suddenly, and even Sirius seems relieved that someone is speaking at last. "Growing up."

Sirius makes as if he is drinking to Lily and says sarcastically, "Oh, Evans, such amazing capacities of deduction, such –"

"Get over it," Lily snaps. "Get over it or I won't be sure I'll still like you tomorrow."

It takes a few seconds for Sirius's bitter smirk to disappear and for him to come back from his Firewhiskey-dominated world.

"You mean you like me?"

Lily bites her lip, obviously restraining herself from retorting something along the lines of _oh, such amazing capacities of deduction_, and, really, Remus can't blame her. Sirius has been acting sulky for almost an hour now because he'd already had too much to drink, but now Remus can tell he is downright drunk and when he is drunk he gets _rather_ depressed and disagreeable.

"Why, yes, Sirius. Usually it's not surprising news to you when someone likes you."

James smiles lovingly at Lily. Sirius still looks bewildered.

"But… I thought you disliked me just like you used to dislike James."

"I quite like you," Lily says serenely. "And I'm sure I'll like you even more when you stop acting like a right jerk. You're nice to me sometimes, I can see that it's possible. If you get over that Peter Pan syndrome."

Sirius blinks and takes yet another gulp of alcohol. He is probably too drunk to realize he does not even know what a Peter Pan syndrome is. Remus and Lily share a small smile as Remus is the only one to be able to get the reference.

"Know what, I quite like you too, actually," Sirius admits.

Remus smiles slightly: Sirius is in his next drunkenness phase now, which means that soon…

"Prongs, mind if I hug your Lily flower?"

It takes pretty much all of James's friendship not to burst out laughing at Sirius's look of utter seriousness. Lily looks like she has just been proposed to by Filch. James nods and Sirius staggers towards James's bed and throws himself on it, encircling Lily with his strong arms.

"Sorry I've been such a jerk," Sirius mutters, his voice muffled by Lily's hair. "I never meant to hurt you… well I did mean to hurt you, at some point, I suppose, but… thinking about it I realize Prongs couldn't have got himself a better girl, and, it had to happen, I guess… so yeah, better you than anyone else, right? And whoever that Peter bloke is I'll try not to be like him and I'll try to live with it and be less selfish, Evans… I mean, Lily. Oh can I call you Evans just for tonight, please? Hmm… sweet world of illusions for a bit longer?"

Sirius pulls back and gives Lily his puppy eyes and Remus can tell she doesn't know whether to laugh or to be impressed by Sirius's extraordinary capacity to produce such long, pathetic rants.

"You can," Lily says kindly.

"Thanks, Evans," Sirius says, yawning, and gives her a grateful, manly pat on the shoulder. "Glad you understand me."

"Not that I can really understand the fear of growing up since I've been longing for that for so long, but yes… I think that explains lots of things."

James kisses her. "Thanks for being so understanding. None of us here deserves you. Well, except Moony, maybe…"

Remus grins from his bed by the window.

"I haven't drunk enough not to note that 'maybe'," Remus says, pretending to be affronted.

"It's not about deserving someone," Lily says sincerely, and then frowns. "My head aches…"

"I'm afraid Firewhiskey is a bit too strong for you, love," James says teasingly.

"You wish," Lily smiles wickedly. "I could surprise you, you know. But not tonight, I think we've had enough drunk people with one Sirius Black. Who is, I must admit, a truly surprising person."

Lily frowns, realizing Sirius has not said anything for quite some time, and as she turns she sees him, his body spread over James's bed, leaving little place for James and herself.

Sirius is asleep. James looks at Lily sheepishly and she smiles.

"Yes, a truly surprising person indeed."

* * *

**Please review! Reviews are the only payment fanfic authors receive. Even if it's just a word or two, leaving a review lets me know you've passed this way. Thank you!**


End file.
